Wednesday, April 13, 2005

H, III

Lauryn Hill- The Miseducation Of

Like most of the reviews on this page, the critical approach that I’m using tends to lean towards the indie/punk side of things. In the little community that I’m in, there was SO much lip service paid to ‘Miseducation’ when the album was released in 1998 that there was already an impetus to like/get into the record even before it was listened to.

How did this happen? Did Lauryn Hill sneak into the hipster complex under the cover of darkness and dose the water supply while we slept? Were all the kids following the suggestive power of the grapevine? Did everyone do what I did and only listen to ‘Lost Ones,’ the first (hip-hop) song on the record and then throw the fucking thing across the room because the rest of the record is full of unlistenable yowling about Zion? Lord only knows. I do know this- of all of the records reviewed so far, this one was by far the most talked up and least rewarding.

Himsa- Death Is Infinite

Completely competent but unremarkable metal (a band of six people to make this album, for the record.)

How many different ways are there to say ‘completely competent but largely unremarkable genre rock?’ Well, we’re up to the letter ‘h.’ So, let’s do some quick math:

Letters remaining: 18
Letters subtracted for purposes of obscurity: 4 (K,Q,X,Z)
Average number of competent but unremarkable records per letter: 3
18 x 4 = 52

So, yeah. Hopefully there’s more than fifty-two, otherwise my head’s going to really fucking hurt when I start bashing it against my desk.

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